The confusion that I’m referring to goes beyond your average day-to-day misunderstandings. Confusion in this context refers to an uncertainty, a lack of clarity as to what to do or where to go next in life. This can happen to anyone at any time, and it’s certainly not reserved for a certain age group or situation. Everything can be going smoothly, you are professionally accomplished and well respected by society because of your role and contribution, and yet, something bad can happen and suddenly you’re left to sort out where you stand after this turn of events. To clear confusion, you first have to be clear about what you value. When you are clear about your values, it becomes really easy to make decisions. So when you have the clarity to know what is important to you, then you can simply see whether it aligns with what you want or not.
What I find with what I do, is that most people do in fact know what they value. For instance, have a look at how you spend your time, how you spend your resources and how you use your talent and why you spend it that way- then you’re able to evaluate what you value.
Having said that, although it’s easy to take a look at how we are spending these things, it is not always easy to identify why we spend them that way, largely because most of this is being programmed by society as to how we should spend these resources. Society informs these values and expectations in many ways, one of which is through advertising, so as to never require you to make a conscious choice. Make a conscious choice about what you value and it is very easy to move forward.
Change comes from being able to discern unsustainable values from sustainable values. At EAP we help people become clear about what they value and help them identify what the consequences are of unsustainable values and what the benefits of sustainable values play. We don’t ask people to make a choice and we don’t dictate which values they should align with, we just help them to identify with the values they feel they would like to.